Grooms Beware – Brides and Their Mothers have a Conspiracy Against YOU

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Guys don’t want anything to do with planning weddings, which is just what brides and their mothers need to conspire against those unsuspecting grooms.

Grooms think they’ve got it made because the bride and her mother are more than happy to plan everything. Most grooms just want to know what to wear and when to show up, and brides are happy to let them get their way. Guys have no idea what is really going on.

I get lots of wedding invitations. That happens when you’ve been a scout leader and coach for as long as I have. Today I received another invitation. Each invitation always includes information about a gift registry, and inevitably when I look online at the list of desired gifts it is obvious that it was set up by the bride and her mother.

Now brides don’t get upset with me. But hey, fair is fair. Brides are excited and want stuff for the kitchen, bath, home decorations, and stuff to play house for real. Guys never seem to have anything on those gift registries that they would like to have.

There is a conspiracy among brides and their mothers, and it all begins with the gift registry. Let them handle all the wedding arrangements – pictures, invitations, reception, who wears what, the whole works, BUT get your two cents in when it comes to the gift registry.

Why? Grooms your beautiful wife secretly plans to use all those wedding gifts to cook and bake every day. After all, she thinks she will show her love for her husband by cooking yummy stuff. In other words, grooms you are about to become much larger than you are. Look at any wedding registry and you will see that the evidence is clear!

One of my former scouts got married a couple years ago. I haven’t seen him since the wedding, and just ran into him at the movie theater. I almost didn’t recognize him. Married life has certainly caused him to grow in many ways.

Guys there are bound to be things you’d like from sporting goods stores, or electronics departments. How about a new fishing pole for example?  Besides, fish is a non-fattening food. You get to use your fishing pole, and she gets to use her new pans to cook it. Now that makes a happy marriage. She gets to cook, and you stay thin!

I have learned that it is easier to stay at my ideal weight than it is to lose weight. It all begins with the wedding registry. Hope this is helpful to your wedding plans, and your future health.

 

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